Reflections on Motherhood

This Mother's Day I found myself reflecting on the many experiences I have had as a mother. I guess it started when I attended a mother daughter night of fun with Ashley and her youth group. We played a fun game and one of the questions we were each asked to answer was "Why is your mother/ daughter special to you?" Ashley's answer was "She is one of a kind and she is MY mother."

Each of my children are wonderfully unique and so they have each taught me different things. As I was thinking about the uniqueness of my children I thought of a few ways they each have taught me.

Nathan was twelve when I became his step-mom. When he was in the seventh grade he was in choir and the teacher wanted each of the boys to wear matching ties. The parents were expected to go to the fabric store and buy the certain fabric she had picked out and then sew the tie. The only thing I had ever sewn was a pillowcase and a bag in 7th grade home economics. I went over to my mother in laws house borrowed her sewing machine and got a few tips and made his tie. From this experience I learned to sew and have made many dresses, blankets and outfits for my children. Nathan also taught me to be more open in my views of the world and people.

Jenny, my daughter in law. The first time we were able to meet in person was the day of her wedding. It was her day and yet she took the time to hug and say hi to each of us before her wedding. She teaches me through her kindness. She loves Nathan so much and she has been a wonderful friend to my older girls. She always remembers us on special days. I am enjoying the chance to get to know her better.

Ashley, my first child to be pregnant and give birth to. I learned first hand the miracle of being a part and creating and giving life to a child. She has also helped me to see life from a different perspective than my own. She has taught me to be a friend to everyone and that every girl (no matter how old or young) is a princess and deserves to be treated special.

My 14 different babies we cared for as a family service project for a local adoption agency, taught me many lessons. The first was that each of us comes to this earth with our own personalities and we are unique. By caring for each of these little ones I was able to meet courageous birthmothers and wonderful adoptive parents. Little did I know that this was preparing me for the adoptions of my future children.

Katy, my miracle baby. It took us 36 months of fertility meds and doctors visits to get pregnant with her. She has always been a wise little soul. Her personality is very close to mine so in her teenage years I am learning patience.lol Some times it is like looking at my personality in the mirror and I can see the positive attributes as well as the negative attributes. I have been able to work on some of the negative personality traits I have, we both have learned how stubborn and hardheaded we can be.

Sarah, my answer to prayers. Nine months after having an allergic reaction to fertility meds we met Sarah's birthmother and four days later Sarah was born. I held her when she was five hours old. Her birthmother and I shared the deepest form of gratitude that one woman can have for another. She wanted her child to be raised in a family with a mother and father and I wanted another child but could not without her selfless act. Sarah has also caused me to grow in many other ways. Sarah was not supposed to have any special needs but as she got older many special needs have surfaced and I have had to learn acceptance, patience and tolerance due to these special needs.

Noah, teaches me that love and being a part of a family can heal the most horrific abuse. I have learned first hand to never say never. Noah came to our home a little shell from the trauma and abuse he had known in his life. Even though he had endured more than any one should have too he still had a glow of life and love in his eyes. I have been able to witness first hand the power that love has to heal.

Jacob, my first baby boy. Jacob has taught me the over whelming JOY that can be felt when you are serving another. There are many things he can't do for himself and it has been an honor to be able to do these things for him. By caring for him I have felt so many emotions on such a deep level. I guess this is why it tore my heart out and I was in the most agony I have ever experienced in my life when he was so sick in the hospital last year and I was told he probably would not make it through the night. Caring for him has made me so much of who I am today.

Hannah, my little caboose. She has taught me that a strong will to live and be a part of this life can get help you overcome the BIGGEST obstacles placed before you. Hannah literally has something wrong with every organ and system in her little body. She spent most of her first year of life fighting to stay alive. She taught me the power of faith, fasting and prayers can bring about miracles. She has proved every doctor wrong and they smile when they admit it or when they see her reaching milestones she was not supposed to be able to do.

Each mother has there own story of there journey and each of these journeys are unique and beautiful. I am grateful for all the mothers who teach me by sharing their journey. I am so grateful for my journey through motherhood and I am glad it is a journey that will last forever!